Maintenance
I forget some people are still operating the way I did before cancer and MS. They are taking on all the tasks they feel they should be doing. They are putting themselves last. Caring for yourself is not a selfish act. It is a gift you give to those you love and live with.
A car has always been a necessity for me. I need it to commute to work. I need it to get food and to attend appointments. I maintain my car, give it fuel, take it in for regular oil changes and maintenance. I care for it before it breaks. I give it what it needs regularly because I depend on it. Its failure to perform will cause exponential difficulties in my life and in the lives of those who must now taxi me to all my places.
We know this truth about cars, yet we ignore this truth when it applies to our own health. We push until we’ve run out of gas, then get out and force the car further on fumes. We limp along, broken and in need of repair instead of taking a moment to tend to our needs so we can be whole and dependable again.
During my first few years as a driver I drove cars hoping and wishing they would do their job, but rarely fully caring for them. I prayed they would start. I sent them for repairs only after they were broken. I pushed them to their limits because I lacked the resources to fully care for and maintain them. This behavior promoted constant worry, fear and doubt. I never fully had peace because I couldn’t predict or depend on my vehicle to do its job.
We are infinitely more valuable than cars and the people who depend on us are precious. Taking time to rest your body, pausing to feed your soul, and checking in with how you truly are feeling is selfless not selfish. By caring for yourself, you become more dependable and more patient. You become stronger and more resiliant. You will have less flat tires and tired engines.
I’ve been forced to do this maintenance and care because my body will shut down if I ignore its needs. What did I miss out on when I pushed through the warning signals until I was forced to stop? I missed out on peace. I missed out on moments with family when I was just trying to get through the day, I missed out on relationships. I missed out on knowing how it feels to be whole.
Unlike cars, each person’s maintenance looks differently. Find time for things that bring you peace and joy, and rest when you need it. Ultimately, find time and resources to feed and rest your soul and body.
